Tuesday October 27th

Another cold and cheerless day with rain at intervals throughout the day. Father had the Professor in to breakfast this morning which seems to have amused him somewhat. Aunt Mary asked him why he was called ‘Professor’ and he replied ‘I suppose it is from my large and rusty glasses!’ She then asked him if he answered ‘Halls’ and he remarked Smurthwaite usually did it ‘he likes doing it, he feels important!!!’ I have been chuckling over this. To see Gow and the Professor talking to each other is a delightful sight, each beaming over the tops of their glasses at each other!

Etheridge told us a charming thing he had overheard. Two small Westminster boys, whose names he didn’t know, were reading the notice of our Shakespeare Society and one said to the other ‘What’s this?’

‘That, Oh! That’s the Literary Society, they read Shakespeare and have been reading George IV most of the term!!!’ Shakespeare and George IV! It is to be presumed there was a slight mixture in his brain, for we have just finished Henry V.

This afternoon I piloted Sargeaunt round the Abbey and pointed him out a large number of things, like the lady in ‘Lady Epping’s Lawsuit’ (I think) after that the conversation became general. I talked and he listened!

I came back and found F. J. J. Bandinel who was Head of House and Princeps Oppidanorum in 1863 had come down and been over the House. He insisted on going right to the top of the house because he had slept there and was highly pleased to find his name in Inner, he had quite forgotten it was there. I came just as he was going up school so I took him up, he seemed interested, I took him into the Old Library [presumably the Busby Library] where he had been when in the VIth [Sixth Form]. He seemed to remember that the old tables (not the present) in the Old Library were made from the wood of the Spanish Armada. A new variation to me, I had only heard before about the tables in Hall but that those in the Library were made the same time i.e. 1730-50!!…Bandinel didn’t tell me anything much else of interest, he is a funny old thing, look older than he is having been out in China for many years, he had a sort of courtliness in his manner which was rather taking and Mrs Bandinel who accompanied him seemed rather nice.

I had a bad shock in Shak. Soc. tonight and found I had to make love to Bonner. in the last scene of Henry V. As I remarked to Low ‘I do not like having to make love to Bonner with a bad and snuffling cold’. Afterwards I read the Society a somewhat stupid paper by Nichols on ‘Beaumont and Fletcher‘. Oh! I was so ‘perlite’ to Nichols and I was so bored he persisted in coming back and talking to me in Inner. It is a very tiring little job talking pleasantly to people who bore one to distractions, he tells me he is writing a drama for Oscar Asche and Lily Brayton, also a poem of his was quoted by the Governor General of Canada (?) before the Prince of Wales. Consequently he is very much the Great Poet, but he means very well and I suppose it is not his fault that he bores me so!…

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Monday October 26th

. Hobson tells me Whitmore was asked if it [presumably the tanning he received from the author] was a good one and answered in the affirmative. He is still somewhat quiet and his jauntiness to me has a defiant if forced note in it, or so it seems to me! Hobson and Marriott are more or less reconciled. Father had a long ‘jaw’ with Marriott today and gathered he got on with all the monitors save one. Father insisted on the importance with getting on with Hobson and he promised to make advances to him so I hear that a reconciliation, more or less surely on Marriott’s part but still a reconciliation, took place and they agreed to be as they were before i.e. only on the verge of a quarrel! But as Hobson says they will both try and give way a little to the other and probably they will get on better terms as time goes on, I am sure I devoutly hope so. I wondered what an unnatural calm meant in Marriott the last day or so, I suppose that he was thinking it over.

It poured with rain most of today so there was no station. I finished ‘Interplay’ by B. Harraden which I enjoyed though the end is unnecessarily morbid.

Dear JS remarks to Father today ‘Marriott is not as nice as he looks, he thinks he knows things he doesn’t’. I wonder how he has been annoying JS who rarely makes comments like that.

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Sunday October 25th

I got up and went to the Early Service this morning and went again at 10 o’clock and sat in Poets’ Corner with Aunt Mary. The Dean of St. Albans preached from the text ‘Study to be quiet’. Somewhat long and very soothing; I found, like Mr. Badcock in ‘Sir John Constantine’, I listened better with my eyes shut.

This afternoon Ray and I went to the Albert Hall which I enjoyed muchly we began with the Overture to ‘Tannhauser’ which delighted me. Madame Julia Culp sang and sang well, if you didn’t look at her, a little song of Schubert and another of Mendelssohn. We ended up with ‘Pomp and Circumstance’ which inspires me somewhat, though I know musical people don’t much approve.

This, so the preacher reminded us this morning is Agincourt day and I have been murmuring to myself all day lots of the Henry V speech, the only one in the play I really delight in as it contains the line ‘We few, we happy few, we band of brothers’, beside the more stirring ones such as ‘And Crispin Crispian shall ne’er go by, But we in it shall be remember’d’

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Saturday October 24th

I really believe we have succeeded in squashing Whitmore, he seems subdued today, though he poses as a martyr and I gather rather that Hall disapproved of his execution. I expect that I am unpopular for the moment but it will pass.

We had a very lengthy and somewhat dull paper on ‘Ants’ by Wade in Nat. Hist. Soc. this afternoon, Low tells me I looked bored, I certainly was so but hoped I had concealed the fact remembering the dictum of — was it Thackeray? — ‘the true gentleman is he who never appears bored.’ The Spectator today quotes a delightful remark of the Prince Regent on Sir Robert Peel: ‘He is not a true gentleman, he divides his coat-tails before he sits down!!’

I spoke to the amazing Smurthwaite today and told him my books didn’t seem to have been dusted this term, he said ‘oh that’s Sorley, it’s really his business but I spoke to him today about it, however I’ll get my duster and do it!!’ He manages to do for his own pleasure three quarters of the fagging of the House, always the first to answer ‘Halls’ etc. Consequently this evening my table was dusted and arranged with mathematical precision, everything arranged in severe straight lines. I regret to say I didn’t go up-fields today, it was so wretchedly cold but wandered up St. Martin’s Lane way, left my address at various print-shops; at the last of these the man discoursed on the good qualities of the Dean and how he admired him!

I went to tea in College this evening with Benvenisti, the party consisted of Barrington-Ward, Low, E.S. Wood, Charles Trealt who left last term, myself and later Heaton-Ellis, a sweet and pleasant party. Gow (Jim) put his head in in the middle and asked about the match. Cuthbert Gow also (for a short time) came in, I wish I could like him better, we both try I think to be pleasant to each other but he has an unpleasant habit of interjecting ‘words of one syllable’ in the most of his remarks which irritates me. Barrington-Ward told us that he is ‘working’ the Dean and he is going to see him, his own idea is to prevent all formality such as stifling the Dean up in the Old Library to talk to us, he is very anxious if possible to meet at the Deanery in a sort of conversation and let the Dean just talk to us as he felt inclined. Also Barrington-Ward said he would only ask those who would be really interested and only a very select few. This sounds delightful, and if the Dean agrees and will talk to us sometimes on Abbey history etc. it will be an exceedingly interesting experience.

We talked on Gow and Gowisms, such as the famous day when I was in the Transitus, and we were struggling through some Livy, when Gow suddenly said ‘hullo, that’s a very fat sparrow out there’!! Barrington-Ward told the story of Duckworth and the smoking chimney. The Matron had lit a fire three days before the beginning of term and Duckworth sent round and said the smoke was blowing into his house and spoiling his new paint and the fire must be put out. The Matron who knows and cares nothing for Deans or Canons sent back a message to say that unless the Headmaster gave her orders she wasn’t going to put it out. Duckie then sent and said she was to come and see him at once, which she refused to do, and Duckie went off in a rage to Gow, who soothed him. I do not know any story which illustrates better Cathedral life and the dislike which the old type of Canon, of whom Duckie is the last, had for the school. As Gow remarked on another occasion, ‘Duckworth’s getting an awful old dog on the Chapter!’ We talked on till six and I thoroughly enjoyed the conversation, I think I shall have to give a little tea party in Inner sometime soon. This evening I went into The Raynors‘ but found Mrs Raynor had gone to bed with a head-ache so only talked to Muriel for a few minutes.

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Friday October 23rd

‘Dr Markham has left us to my no small grief’ writes – from Westminster in 1764 ‘our new master Dr Hinchliffe is I believe very good natured, he did not flog anyone the first week, but he has gone on at a good rate since’! Mutato nomine, it is equally true today for we had another ‘regrettable incident’ tonight. Briefly the facts were these: from about 1/4 to 7 to 7.15 I go in and talk to Aunt Mary in the Study. This evening while I was away the Hallites were making a great noise so Hobson ‘Halled’ and told them to ‘shut up’. Instead of doing so the noise increased if anything and high above the din was heard Hodgson vainly telling Whitmore to ‘shut up’. Tonight therefore I had no other course but to have Whitmore up. He came in ‘eating’ if you please. However, I didn’t say anything on that but begun:

‘At about 7 o’clock you were making a disgraceful noise in Hall tonight, and you aggravated the offence by augmenting instead of decreasing the noise after you had been told to make less noise. Have you any excuse to make’

‘I didn’t know I was making much noise and I stopped after the ‘hall’

‘Oh!’ (better but not quite Reedian!) ‘Go out’

He irritated me by smiling in at Middle as he came in again. I then addressed him thus:

‘We have decided to tan you because unfortunately for you your case breaks down. After the ‘hall’ you were distinctly heard by name being told to ‘shut up’. You have been suffering from what is commonly called ‘swollen head’. I am perfectly aware that all this term you have been trying to see just how far you could go with me. You haven’t impressed me in the least. The only impression you have given me is that you are a very silly little boy. (He didn’t like this) It is your duty now to help keep order in Hall and prevent there being too much noise, but of course if you choose to behave like a little boy you must be treated as such. Go out’

‘Rather good’ remarked Hobson. I had to say ‘it was rather hot stuff wasn’t it?’ It was really Hobson’s turn but I exercised my privilege of deciding who should execute. Poor Hobson was aching to do it and offered to toss me for it but I had suffered under Master Whitmore too long and Hobson admitted he didn’t wonder that I wished to do it. I am sufficiently brutal to flatter myself I smote him pretty ‘tight’, I meant to and it was a somewhat different little boy who went out, with one hand behind(!), to he who came in. It will do some good I think and curb any idea I can’t hurt when I want to. It will, I trust, instil a wholesome feeling of respect and stop this too vigorous exhibition of the power of the Law which I have been forced to make this mark. I think the general opinion is expressed in a remark which some Chiswickite was making as I happened to pass ‘Of course he does make a lot of noise, but still..’ (sees me!!). This little remark amused me…

Hobson, Graham and Miles were reconciled tonight and are again on terms of friendship.

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Thursday October 22nd

It is no good. I tried hard to be ‘a very great seigneur indeed’ tonight but like Rowland Edwards and his philosophy ‘my cheerfulness kept breaking in!’ In other words I had up Sedgwick for being out of bed. He said he hadn’t heard the half strike. ‘Have you a watch?’ said I.

‘Yes’ say he ‘only it is always slow’

My fatal mouth, it would twitch do what I would and I fear he saw. However, I sent him out and after a decent interval had him back and delivered this not over brilliant harangue horribly conscious of the fact that Hobson, inwardly gurgling, was standing next to me!

‘We have decided to (brutal me! I paused here) let you off this time but at the same time it is only because we have not ÔÇ£had you upÔÇØ before that we are doing so. It seems impossible to impress on you new boys that you must be in bed by the half. You three in the three bedder have given us a lot of trouble this term. You were out of bed 5 times out of 6 nights which is I believe a record in the first fortnight and I was seriously considering whether I wouldn’t have your substances up and tan them in your place. There is no earthly reason why you shouldn’t be in bed in time. You have heaps of time. You, have less excuse than the others because you haven’t got to do our tables; it is simply because you won’t hurry and stay about in Mrs Thresher’s room or play about on the landing. However we have decided to let you do this time, so you may go, but don’t ever be late again or you won’t receive such lenient treatment’.

Hobson dashed my pride by saying he didn’t believe he was a bit impressed and was almost inclined to smile. I do not think so. I think he was slightly agitated and I think it will have some effect on him.

This afternoon I walked with Sargeaunt up to Webb, Miles & Co. and ordered a pair of trousers, also to Strand, Son and Richards and ordered an Overcoat.

We had no Deb. Soc. tonight as all the King’s Scholars were away, this being the ‘setting up’ night for the Play. This, formerly one of the most jealously guarded secrets, is now but slightly kept at least in the Upper School, the parts are pretty generally known long before the 1st Play Night.

I went up to Sandows. I forgot to mention the last time I went there I amused and shocked my man by saying that I felt perfectly ill after looking at Mr Sandow’s book and no one had any right to publish such unpleasant pictures. Whatever happened he must promise not to make me come out all over nobbles and bumpts where undeveloped muscles had been brought out!

At lunch today Marriott and myself spoke like brothers on ‘The Scarlet Pimpernel’ and Shakespeare’s plays (pardon the conjunction!)

The children were so much in bed tonight that only, or so it seemed to me, the tops of their heads were visible, even as this morning when I went to breakfast ‘Hall’ were standing in two parallel lines in their places at table instead of scurrying from the fireplace. Truly it seemeth efficacious for the moment! I wrote House Notes this evening for The Elizabethan and Barrington-Ward is back in School again today I am glad to say.

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Wednesday October 21st

Oh! Thou bloudie man! I am fairly ‘steepled in gore’ today owing to the ruthless slaughter of three children, Collier, Radford and Shore. I was again very nervous, I can’t imagine why, but I managed to control my voice. Whitmore answered my ‘Hall‘, yet another piece of cheek, for the junior person present is supposed to do so.

‘Send Radford, Shore and Collier here.’ They arrive. With a great effort I controlled my shaking voice I flatter myself rather well. ‘Shore and Radford you were out of your Dormitories at 9.25 last night. You, Shore, were in another dormitory and Radford was practically so. Have you any excuse to make.’ Apparently not, at any rate, no sound came. ‘Go out’. ‘You, Collier, were late for breakfast this morning. The bell must have gone five minutes before you came in. Have you any excuse to make?’ Pause then, as a drowning man,

‘I was getting jam I was in the room all the time.’

‘Oh! Go out.’ I wish I could imitate Reed’s ‘Oh!’ It was a masterpiece of biting acidness. Of course Radford and Shore hadn’t got a leg to stand on, they were settled and we decided to execute Collier partly for this and partly for being a general nuisance and general uppishness. Another ‘Hall!’

‘We have decided we can’t take your excuses. I am afraid we shall have to tan you all’…

Then the solemn little procession, Hobson quaking. I took Collier who came first. Hobson took Shore, and myself, again Radford. None of them wished to appeal. I don’t think any were much hurt; I didn’t try much, though I smote Radford somewhat. Much annoyed to hear clapping as the last victim came out. Life’s little vexations! Hobson and myself had a bad reaction of nervousness afterwards!

That disgusting little Professor was out of bed again tonight. What am I to do? I have been cursing my own weakness all the afternoon.

Father left us at lunch and after he had gone someone was showing the Natural History Society card where Usher is down to read a paper on ‘Bacteria’.

‘What are bacteria?’ asks Marriott.

‘Microbes’ says Hobson

‘Like yourself’ says Marriott.

I was disgusted and froze at once but I had not the strength of mind on the moment partly because I was too staggered to say anything. Ugh! That Marriott knew how I should like ‘to bash and crash him.’ As it was I only answered him in monosyllables for the rest of lunch. He saw I was disgusted.

I walked up to the Society of Antiquaries today and looked up some references but not with much success as far as Westminster was concerned.

Afterwards I went into the House of Lords sending in my name as usual to Black Rod (Sir H. Stephenson). As I said to the Doorkeeper one may just as well do these things properly, especially as he remarked after so ‘many little incidents as there have been of late!’ The debate was not uninteresting on Ireland and ended up with a fine and powerful condemnation of the Government by Lord Ashbourne. He fairly ramped and roared. Incidentally I noticed the Marquis of Londonderry said ‘starnch’ for ‘staunch’ thus bearing out Lady Grove in the ‘Social Fetich’.

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Tuesday October 20th

Today we are faced with another problem. ‘Dearmer‘, so his mother writes (though unbeknown to him), ‘arrived home feeling very sick and with his trousers slashed rent.’ He had, apparently owing to having got up top in his form, been put in the big boot basket and rolled over in it while water was poured on to him! He is a really dreadfully highly-strung person and suffers acutely from anything like this. By a process of elimination the evidence points to Collier and of course backed up by Whitmore as being the culprits. But the problem is how to make sure and also keep Dearmer’s name out of it. Of course at present he has no idea that we know anything about. It is rather disgusting to find this species of bullying going on right in our midst, nor am I able to see how they managed to do it presumably from 5 to 5.15 without any of us seeing anything as one or other were going through, or were about, the Under Changing room at this time. At present the problem beats me…

We have had more difficulty with Raynor over the Shakespeare Society, Malden who has not yet got into the College Society asked to join ours and asked Raynor if he any objection and Raynor remarked that he was afraid it was not a ‘Collegite Society’. Silly little man! I had to take Henry V tonight in Shak. Soc. Barrington-Ward who was to have taken it being out of school. It is not a play I really care for but the Crispin speech is really magnificent and I much enjoyed reading it. We finished ‘The Midsummer Night’s Dream’ in our House Society tonight. We were all so paralyzed with laughter we had some difficulty in getting on. Pemberton started giggling in the Thisbe speech about ‘the cowslip cheeks’ and could not go on and we all giggled feebly and matters were not improved by Tomlinson coming out with ‘the Lion tongue of night’ instead the ‘iron tongue’. ‘Fee, fee’ is a new variation of Fie, Fie, to me but it came out tonight.

We had a tragedy tonight. I went round dormitories at 9.25 tonight (you go up when you can on Lit. Soc. nights) and when I reached the Upper landing Shore was standing on the inside of the door of the 6-bedder dormitory and Radford clothes only in his lower portions with pyjamas was standing behind. It was a fair ‘kop’, because both sleep upstairs, again, both were out of the dormitories after 9.15 and one was inside another dormitory to his own, all tannable offences. I stood almost half a minute until Shore turned and saw and bolted upstairs like a frightened rabbit even then Radford didn’t see until I touched him and asked him what he was doing. I am afraid it means an execution either way. I couldn’t catch whom I wanted to catch, it is one of the exasperating things about Whitmore – he is always just not doing the thing; before I got to the door I heard Hodgson saying ‘Shut up’ all unknowing I was there so when I opened the door though scared they were outwardly doing nothing. Incidentally Whitmore nearly floored me in Prep by asking me suddenly what denominational (I can’t spell it) teaching was, I gasped out the right answer but it was somewhat of a guess.

Today we started Fives.

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Monday October 19th

An uneventful day. It had rained in the night so much that there was no ‘station’. I went for a walk with Sargeaunt in between Schools and had my hair cut. I had much difficulty in keeping awake with Forbes this afternoon and was so cold during prayers that I trembled all over.

Sandow’s in evening in consequence late back for tea, but I managed to keep conversation going ‘fine’ as the Americans say. Thank goodness it is Hobson’s week and he takes Prep Monday, Wednesday and Friday. I had a terrific long conversation with him tonight on many subjects and we both got to know each other better by it. I asked him how he stood in the Graham-Marriott row and I gather that Graham and Miles are prepared to let matters slide but of course Marriott is the trouble and carefully nourishes the fire. He is a silly fellow at an awkward stage.

I was much amused at lunch when I heard him talking about someone having a ‘swollen head’. I find Hobson also had much ado to keep from laughing. Marriott’s carefully ‘got up’ conversation about Monitors are very funny; I hear he asked Tunnecliffe openly when he was going to leave and wondered who the next Monitor would be! ‘It is ill waiting for dead men’s shoes’, my friend and you will not be a Monitor while I am Head of Grants if I can help it.

Bye the by Roland Reed came in to tea with Father this evening. He is a nice fellow but not as delightful as his brother, perhaps because I don’t know him so well. He tells me Gordon Reed has got very nice rooms and played in the ‘Freshers’ match but ‘took jolly good care not to get knocked about’, a most characteristic Reedian saying and somewhat sums up his attitude towards Football though he was a ‘Pink’ his heart was never in the game.

I was amused as I went round Dormitories tonight the Professor made an awful scuffle with the clothes as I opened the door and before I turned up the light. I had to say it was ‘a narrow squeak’! They were much amused and the Professor explained he didn’t know the half had struck!

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Sunday October 18th

In a misguided moment I went to St. Matthew’s this morning. Of the service the less said the better, it grated on me while the incense made me feel sick and the congregation crossed themselves and genuflected on every occasion. The organ was at times quite beautiful, but only for very brief intervals.

Spent an industrious evening clearing out drawers and putting all my Westminster Papers etc. into one box, together.

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